Shyness

Below is an extract from Babycenter.com. At least here's an article I find comforting. At least here it does not say that it's my upbringing of Ryo that's making him this way. At least I'm heading the right way in requesting for smaller classes rather than force him to join larger noiser classes.


Why it happens
If your child frequently hides his head in your pant leg and resists trying new things, you've probably already concluded that he's naturally bashful. He might also be a bit anxious or restless and cry when he's faced with unfamiliar people or situations. Maybe he's a light sleeper. Perhaps he's even more sensitive than other kids to teething and illness. You may wonder where this tendency came from and whether it will last.

Most experts now believe that, to a great extent, a child's basic temperament is inborn — that some kids come into the world outgoing and assertive while others are naturally bashful or reserved. This is a relatively new notion. For a long time it was believed that a child's environment was primarily responsible for shaping his character. But scientists today believe they've found genes linked to shyness, fearfulness, even thrill-seeking behavior. So your child's temperament — largely a product of his neurochemistry — may predispose him to be wary of new situations and make him slow to warm up to the unfamiliar.

Before deciding that your toddler is shy, though, consider that he may be going through a shy stage brought on by separation anxiety. Here's how to tell the difference: If your child has suddenly become more cautious around strangers or fearful of letting you out of his sight, it's probably separation anxiety, which suddenly crops up right around the time most children become more mobile and independent. Almost all children go through at least one episode between 7 and 18 months, and many continue to have bouts of separation anxiety until they're 3 or even older. (These may be triggered by situations like a new childcare setting, a parent going out of town, or a fear of being alone in the dark.)

If you sense that your toddler's bashfulness is more than a stage, try not to worry. The fact that he has a more introverted personality doesn't have to hold him back. He might occasionally need some special TLC from you, though.

What to do
Don't label your child as shy.
It's best not to speak about your child's timidity with others in his presence. He may hear "He's shy" as a criticism or "He's just shy" as an excuse that sets him apart from others. Instead, try saying "He takes his time to get comfortable with people he doesn't know." Try not to always think of your child as shy, either. If you expect shyness, your expectation may influence his behavior.

Be sympathetic.
Let your child know that you understand how he feels. If you walk into a roomful of toddlers at a birthday party, for example, you might say, "It's hard when all the kids are being so noisy, isn't it?" This tells him that his reaction is normal and that others might well feel the way he does.

Offer encouragement.
Any time your child reaches out to make a friend or join in an activity, praise his efforts, no matter how tentative. If you catch him flashing a bashful smile at Grandma after he's spent 15 minutes hiding in your skirt, say, "That's a nice smile. I bet that makes Grandma happy," instead of commenting on how long it took for him to say hello. Coach your child's aunts, uncles, and grandparents to be patient and to avoid pushing him.

Don't criticize or belittle.
Nothing crushes a child's confidence faster than unkind words, even if you think you're just teasing. Remember, there's nothing to be gained from making your child feel bad for being shy. This is just how he is — it's not a trait that he can turn on and off at will.

Don't avoid social situations.
Although you may think you're making life easier for him, don't keep your child away from group activities. He may take a little longer to involve himself in a playgroup or join the table at a birthday party, but the more he's exposed to such gatherings, the more comfortable he'll become. When you expect it to be a big gathering or party, try to get there early, before other children arrive, so your child will have extra time to relax and feel settled.

Find less stressful ways for your child to be social.
Choose activities that involve smaller groups and quiet or familiar environments. If the library is one of your child's favorite places, you might take him to story hour there or invite a friend to join you for a library visit.

There's no way to know whether your shy child will remain shy, but countless people have outgrown childhood bashfulness. In fact, many researchers believe that as a child grows, the influence of experience overtakes that of genetics. Ultimately, they say, only a fraction — perhaps about 10 percent — of an adult's personality is inborn. So try not to worry about the future. Instead, focus on providing the acceptance and support that will help your child face the world. Help him feel comfortable with himself, and the confidence you instill in him will help him succeed.

Gymboree Level 4

Mama Ann says:

Now that Ryo is almost 16 months and had shown no interest in his activities in his level 3 , we are now promoted to level 4. But as always, he did not participate much. I suppose it is due to his introvert self. Particularly if the environment gets very noisy, or many people are looking at him.

This does not mean he is not developing. Other times when we went there to play on our own, he can play very well. He can even venture on his own to find a toy or an older kid. That is why I prefer a smaller class, so that he can participate with others in a quieter environment.

Tap Dance

Mama Ann says:

Ryo has the talent to tap dance. When he tap dances, we laugh at him, and Mr Vainpot will get more encouraged.

黄狗撒尿

Mama Ann says:

Ryo's latest development: he can do a dog pee stunt when I say 黄狗撒尿. And you know what? Today in his Gymboree class, he refused to participate in the activities (as always), instead he was doing this stunt. Lucky no one notice.

The emperor's new clothes

Ryo says:

Papa's friend bought this emperor's suit for me. I just need a more appropriate cap. This is me and Ah gong waiting to go home after I finished playing at Gymboree.

Roseola infantum

Mama Ann says:

It is what Ryo is suffering from. The more common term people use is "false measle" or "baby measle". He has a viral infection from the herpes group (not thru sexually!!!), that explains his high fever on Tuesday. Now his fever has subsided, he is still suffering from tiredness and lack of appetite.

These few days he just wants to lie on the bed, sleep every 2 hourly like a newborn. He also cuts back on 2 milk feedings. For a mother, it's quite worrying to see that he has no energy to play. Then I did a check on the internet and found the term Roseola. I hope it goes away soon.

Extracted from Babycenter.com:

If your toddler recently had a fever and now has a spotty, raised or flat, rosy-pink rash, it could be roseola, also called roseola infantum.

Roseola is a fairly mild and common viral illness that usually strikes children between 6 months and 3 years of age. Roseola is caused by a kind of herpes virus, although not the type that's sexually transmitted.

What are the symptoms of roseola?
It's possible to have the virus without having noticeable symptoms. But roseola usually starts out with a sudden, relatively high fever, often above 103 degrees Fahrenheit.

The fever typically lasts three to five days and may end abruptly, followed by the telltale rash. The rash may last for days or only hours.

The rash is pink and may have small flat spots or raised bumps. These spots may have a lighter "halo" around them and may turn white if you press on them.

The rash isn't itchy or uncomfortable, and contact with the rash itself doesn't spread the illness. It's usually seen on the trunk and neck, but it can extend to the arms, legs, and face.

If your toddler has roseola, he may also be irritable and tired and have mild diarrhea, a decreased appetite, and swollen eyelids. The lymph nodes in his neck and at the base of his skull may also be a bit enlarged. In general, children with roseola don't appear especially ill, considering how high their fevers get.

Occasionally, children with roseola have a febrile seizure. If this happens, your toddler may become unconscious and jerk his arms, legs, or facial muscles for two or three minutes. He may also lose control of his bladder or bowels.

Although frightening, fever-induced seizures in young children are seldom serious and rarely harmful. If you can, try to time the length of the seizure. Your child's doctor will want to know how long the episode lasted.

Should I call the doctor?
Yes. If your toddler's fever is over 103 degrees F, give his doctor a call.

Also call the doctor if your toddler has an unexplained rash or a febrile seizure. The doctor will ask about your toddler's symptoms, and she may want to take a look at him.

How should I treat roseola?
There's no specific treatment for roseola. Like most viral illnesses, roseola just needs to run its course. The most important thing you can do is make sure your toddler rests and gets plenty of liquids.

Ask your doctor about ways to safely bring down your toddler's fever. She may suggest children's acetaminophen or a lukewarm sponge bath.

Never give a child aspirin. It can trigger Reye's syndrome, a rare but deadly disease.

Is roseola contagious?
Yes, especially among young children. Roseola is spread by saliva or respiratory droplets — when an infected person sneezes or coughs, for example — or by fecal-oral contact. Because a child is contagious before he has symptoms, there's often no way to avoid exposure.

Make sure that all family members — especially those taking care of your toddler — wash their hands frequently. (This is a good idea even in the fever stage because you don't know that you're dealing with roseola until you see the classic rash.)

To play it safe, keep your child home from daycare and away from others while he has a fever. It's probably wise to keep him home until the rash is gone, although he'll be less contagious once he has the rash than he was when he had the fever.

The good news: Once your child has had roseola, he'll probably have lifelong immunity to it.